My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I want to have your abortion
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Randomize
