So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
Randomize
