marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
