the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
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