You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Randomize
