i think i have herpe
just one?
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
I decided that $2 and a kiss on the cheek was a great tip for the pizza girl. No one is REALLY sure how much I've have to drink.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize
