Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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