No awkward lesbian experiences without me
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
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