He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
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