How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
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