i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
at one point while they were drilling into my jaw I just remember thinking "will I ever be able to suck dick again"
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
