Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I think your dad took our porno
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
