How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
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