please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
she texted me out of nowhere. and I wanted to get drunk. like I didn't even have her new number until 6 hours ago and bam we were rolling around drinking cotton candy vodka from the bottle she had stuffed in a boot
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
So i've noticed that drunk me erases sent messages to hide them from sober me, because drunk me knows that sober me will be PISSED at drunk me.
Randomize
