You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
i walked in on you eating. you had the fridge wide open and you were rotating between steak and handfuls of captain crunch.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
I want to fling myself into the sun
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
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