I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
Randomize