i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
