in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize
