I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
we have what I like to call an assload of ramen noodles
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
Randomize
