Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I just blew my weed a kiss
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I wish there were more things in this world as wonderful as string cheese
Surriously
Randomize
