I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
