Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
