"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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