How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Randomize