is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
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