So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
It's like he's trying to get head in every car except his.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
...take a good look at your butthole.... then try matching it to any paint color on the Benjamin Moore color wheel....not gonna happen...
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
