Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
