My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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