I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
