I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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