She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
It's really awkward to greet the pastor when I know I've licked chocolate syrup off his daughter's chest.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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