I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Randomize
