I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
