he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Randomize
