I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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