I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Side note, from now on any snap chat I get that isn't interesting enough... Is getting a dick in response. Judge your snaps accordingly
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
Randomize
