My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
In case you were wondering how drunk I was last night, there was an unopened slim Jim in front of my door and I ate it.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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