No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
how thoroughly do i need to sanitize the cone the vet put around my dog's neck for it to be safe to use as a beer bong?
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Randomize