i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Yeah when we were together he never sent me dick pics like a normal boyfriend. It was always pizzas. That should've been my sign.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Tell me why i have 60 matches in 72 hours on tinder. Can i sell my tinder account like people used to sell their myspace pages and tumblrs when they had a lot of followers? Is that a thing?
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
