No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
If history is any guide, his morals are no match for my tits
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