So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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