I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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