i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Randomize
