Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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