We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
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