There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
Are we still banned from the library?
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
