Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
Randomize
