david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I just found a bag of teeth...
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize
