You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
the day after is always just damage control
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
Randomize
