you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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