Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
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